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What to do when your ‘do’ is a don’t
(by Tracy Beckerman - September 24, 2008)
When you have short hair, it is inevitable that you will spend an inordinate amount of time growing your hair out, and then getting fed up and cutting it again.
I have been down this hair-brained road several dozen times before, complaining for months until I am convinced my husband is going to cut it all off while I sleep just so he doesn’t have to listen to me whine about it one more day.
The last time I decided to torture myself with this hair thing, I made it about six months before my husband told me to either cut it or get a weave. Of course it wasn’t the only thing I’d talked about for six months, but it was definitely in the top five along with 1) my thighs, 2) my wrinkles, 3) my butt, and 4) my kids (I had to throw that last one in there so I didn’t sound completely self-involved).
I actually really liked my old, short spiky “do”, but various people who offered opinions I didn’t ask for convinced me that my short haircut was making me look older, and when you’re over 40, being told something makes you look older goes over about as big as a prescription for a colonoscopy.
This time around, I managed to get past the dreaded “growing it out over my ears” stage, and the “looks a little like the Brady Bunch mom” stage, without running screaming to the hair salon. It helped that whenever I had a hair attack, my stylist seemed to be out of town or all booked up. It also helped that my husband hid all the scissors in the house, except the kids’ plastic school scissors. I did actually try to use them in desperation one day, but they only cut one hair at a time.
Finally, the day came when my hair was officially “grown out,” and even though I was getting lots of positive feedback, I still wasn’t sure if it was the right “do” for me.
Then one morning while I was in my bathroom, I overheard the kids talking in the hall.
“Where’s mom,” asked my son. “We’re gonna be late for school.”
“She’s in the bathroom getting ready,” replied my daughter.
“Argh,” moaned my son. “If she didn’t put on a ton of make-up every day, it wouldn’t take her so long. Why does she have to wear a ton of make-up?”
“To cover up her zits and wrinkles,” replied my daughter.
I grimaced in the bathroom.
“Besides, its not her make-up that takes so long,” said my daughter. “It’s blow-drying her hair.”
“Why does it take so long for her to do her hair?” asked my son.
“Because it’s dull and lifeless,” replied my daughter. “She needs to blow-dry it to add bounce and shine.”
I grimaced again. “I CAN HEAR YOU, YOU KNOW!!!” I bellowed from behind my dull and lifeless locks and the ton of makeup I had applied to cover my zits and wrinkles.
Scraping up what was left of my good self-image, I exited the bathroom, shot the kids dirty looks and stomped to the car. I dropped them off at school and then drove directly to the hair salon.
That night, my husband walked in and noticed my new short hair cut.
“Lost the battle?” he observed.
“Yes,” I said. “By a hair.”
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